September 17, 2018

1. I promise I will not turn in the crazy Educator Parent when I have kids. I will give you permission to beat their ass, I will hire a tutor if they are slow and I will not be played by lies these kids told me about how the teacher completely ignores them each day and hates them. 

1a. I'm also prepping my wife that this exceptionalism we exhibit may not run down to our children and we will have unexceptional, bad ass kids. It's really a roll of the dice...BUT they will not have me out here looking crazy emailing teachers all willy nilly like I don't know what the jig is.

2. Lice outbreak at school. Black girls out here thinking they are in the clear....no your REAL hair may be oily and such but this Malaysian and Peruvian is equal opportunity for those critters.

3. *Me showing the relationship of volume between cylinders and cones* What changed class?
Girl: The shape of the water changed!
*Normally I Family Feud kids with good answer but this time..*
Me:....ooook. So answer me this What IS the shape of water?
Girl:*silence*
Me:* intensely staring for this answer*
Girl:There is no shape.
Me: GOOD ANSWER! GOOD ANSWER!

I like mistakes being made in the classroom and not out in the real world so kids can say 'Mrs. Washington told me....' The hell I did!

4. A mom called the front office to say she was coming to beat up a student AND a teacher for bullying.

4a. The "bullying" the student did was allegedly call her daughter a B*tch....( that is not bullying btw)

4b. The "bully" is 4'7", 80 pounds soaking wet. The "victim" is taller than me....size does matter in this instance because daughter or mother will be at a significant advantage

4c. The girl said she was going to hit the "bully" the teacher said the kid would get in trouble if she did that....real bully behavior by stating facts.

4d. Mama did all of that and never showed up

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