November 27, 2018

Important announcement...if you are or know anybody that is certified in ELAR, don't mind middle school punks, like to work and would like to contribute to my teacher observation fodder at my campus...come holla at your girl. If you are trash or know some trash...leave them where they are at. I don't want to have to talk about anybody.

1. I feel much better today...Mondays are hard...coming back from breaks are hard. But I'm good now.

2. When a parent emails me and mentions behavior first....they already know the answer is their bad ass child...leave me alone. You sent them this way. They are moody and cantankerous because of puberty. I know you wish they were better, I do too...they just need time. I'm cool.

2a. However, this mutual understanding does NOT mean I will freely call you at anytime because first, I have a job and can't call 80 parents all damn day and no....I would rather us not talk so you can underhandedly blame me for some nonsense.

2b. No I don't want to meet either. First, my conference period is in the morning and who wants to get their day started on the wrong foot? Second....come see me at open house FIRST so we can begin with pleasantries instead of meeting on hostile terms. Third, I call students into meetings and the awkward silence of a parent recognizing that their child has embarrassed them is hard on me because I have to contain my laughter or support of "Wait until we get home. I'm taking that Xbox, them Beats, those J's. I'm beating your ass..." *Ok wait I don't want to have to file a report. Oh no, please don't hit your child in front of...*

3. Let's end the day with a story...so my first class of the day..Lesbian drama in the form of a break up. I get to class late but find out the the breakee has had an emotional meltdown and punched a locker and stormed off in her boot (girl that broke her leg while just breathing) then crying and limping away. First, she is a bit dramatic but I also felt her pain because when you break up as a lesbian it's like the end of the world. There are only 5 lesbians in the world in your eyes and 4 of them you have either dated or are your homies so you will now be forever alone. I completely understood. So of course being the good teacher that I am I had to get the tea and let the compassionate teacher deal with the drama.
From other lesbian student: Oh Mrs. Washington. I got the tea. Well...S** and N** broke up
Me: Why?
Her: Idk...but there were like an OG couple. Not longer than me and my girl but they been together for five months.
Me: Five months? Oh ya'll dramatic.
Her: Ugh...Mrs. Washington...you understand...don't you have a wife?
Me: Yes I do...
Her: I knew it! I was right.
Me: Well...ya know....
Her: People ask if you have a husband? Why? It's so obvious.
Me: You'd be surprised....now if you spill my tea, I know exactly who to beat up.

When the right child asks or the gay ones ask *privately*, I always answer honestly. Representation matters so much and in Houston kids are spoiled by being able to encounter a more diverse group of teachers (still room for improvement). Growing up in Austin, everybody had a thing so the representation was there in some form so I didn't feel like I needed to have this type of moment with my teachers but I know it means something to them.

They still get on my damn nerves though.

Most important part of this....they didn't really break up..it was a misunderstanding through text. I keep telling these kids they can't read.

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